I don’t follow sports – especially politics – but I do like the movies. Personally, I see the entire newspaper as a giant sports report. We have the financial sports, geo-political sports, who out-lived whom sports, oh, and yeah, sports sports. While I do admire solo sports – I think solo sports represent the honing of one’s mettle and soul towards the aim of being the best you can possibly be, as opposed to competitive sports where the goal is to be named the best in the world as proved by the whopping of others. You can be the best in the world yet not achieve the best you can be. I believe solo sports to be a growth path and competitive sports to being a narcissistic beauty pageant. I am an avid avoider of competitive sports. I must say that the current election cycle is the dark winter of my discontent. My leanings are what they are – and are largely irrelevant to the “Olympic semi-finals” with which we are now bombarded. The conflation of so many other issues come into this Herculean pre-election sporting competition; that they distort a clear view of the character of the speakers. Continue reading
Ah Synchronicity! Of late I have had a number of people I work with dealing with the fear of leaving their comfort zone and reaching for their dreams. Upon reflection, it seems to me that all of life is leaving one comfort zone for newer and stranger adventures. It starts with that quintessential leaving of our first comfort zone: the womb. Continue reading
Cell phone addiction is a problem that began as a solution. You felt bored or lonely – you reached for the phone. You saw a great sunset – you reached for your phone. You reached for your phone – you reached for your phone – and now you reach for your phone like a true addict. Continue reading
I’ve worked with many long-term couples in sexless marriages. They didn’t start that way. We are all fairly clear that romance starts with lust. It takes a crowbar to make it out of the bedroom. Earlier in marriages it is harder to get out of bed than to get in it. And well it should be. In more mature marriages (5-7 or more years) it is harder get in bed. That goes hand in hand with evolution. Mother Nature cares more about reproduction that she cares about our feelings. In fact, she is quite happy to have us broaden the haploid bank by taking other lovers. It has been hypothesized that the 7 year itch is 7 years because that is how long it takes to get pregnant and to be protected while being an 8 – month, pregnant, slow waddling tiger-food-mom to be. And it takes about 7 years from conception for the fetus to become a child who can and start to contribute to its tribe. After that Mother Nature’s risk/reward assessment favors spreading the genes.
I am often asked about aging well. I answer with a question: ” How old would you feel if you didn’t know your age?” After some preamble, I ususally then hear something along the line, “it’s all in your mind, right?” Much as we would like to believe that aging is in your mind – it is just not so. The leading cause of death is …. birth.
Boy, if there ever was a seductive siren it is the Fear of Missing Out (FoMO.) It has been around since earliest times. FoMO has had many iterations over the centuries. The poorer hunters got the lesser cuts of the catch; and the lesser choice in women. Later, in the 1950s, it became “keeping up with the Jones’s.” Now it has become 1500 friends (you’ve never met – yet feel you must answer every text, post, instagram, etc., and always be (for God’s sake) at least equal.
Bruce Jenner, my hat is most definitely off to you. Last night while my friend was winning an Emmy (congrats David Doyle – you deserve it not only as a producer but as a human being – proud of you!), I was watching the Bruce Jenner interview. It was a very interesting story. 16 hours later I find I feel for him on two counts. The first is compassion for his suffering the weight of a life lead dealing with the issues that are part and parcel of realizing that you are living with being born in the wrong sexed body. Second, I was concerned for him having to “come out” in Macy’s window.
Truth in advertising here: The author is a friend. All that out of the way, this is one fabulous read!
MIDMEN: The Modern Man’s Guide to Surviving Midlife Crisis (a la MadMen), is a must read. Besides being chock full of all sorts of interesting facts about middle age the book serves as both a handbook for surviving middle age as a man, and as an owner’s manual if you happen to be in possession of one of those surly, unruly creatures making their way through midlife: a foot soldier in the army of Midmen.
So what do Justin Bieber, Conrad Hilton and Robert Durst have in common? Recent events made me wonder about that. A friend of mine asked me if I was going to write a blog about Justin Bieber trying to remake his public image by putting himself at the center of a celebrity roast that was filmed this past weekend at the Sony lot. Early reports seem to indicate that no one was fooled. In fact at least one roaster reportedly told Bieber he didn’t like him at all and hope this attempt to rehabilitate his image failed. It’s a sad commentary as well as a testament to his history that even one of the most entitled groups in the world: celebrities, found Bieber‘s antics deplorable.
It’s January 8th – do you know where your resolutions are?
It seems like only yesterday; it was New Year’s Eve. Yet, for many, it seems years ago when we try to remember our resolutions (fervently made, though they may have been.) Packing the list of resolutions in our mind’s back pocket is much like buying a lottery ticket, stuffing it in your desk drawer and never checking it. It is highly unlikely your resolutions will become manifest if you don’t think about them. Never looking at them again leads to never thinking about them. And an unchecked winning ticket in your desk drawer is worthless.
8% of people actually achieve their resolutions! 8%! Why only 8%?